How to Set Non-Negotiable Boundaries: Create Freedom, Flow, and Success in Your Life and Business
Hey Friends!
So here I am, laying in bed, all set to drift off into dreamland so I can be “well-rested” for another day of pretending to be a functioning human at work. But nah, that wasn’t going to happen tonight. Instead, I grabbed my phone because, clearly, I had something more pressing to do — like chatting with you about some deep revelations. Because why not dive into life-changing concepts when you should be sleeping, right?
Tonight’s gem? Setting non-negotiable boundaries with yourself. Yeah, not with your kids or your coworkers (though, let’s be real, they probably need them too), but with yourself. Have you ever stopped to think about how many messes in your life are the result of not setting any boundaries? Because I have. And honey, the mirror is brutal. When I looked at where I was lacking in the boundaries department, guess who the biggest culprit was? Me. Not the kids. Not my coworkers. Me.
And when I talk about “boundaries,” I’m not talking about anything revolutionary. I’m talking about the fact that I’ve been running my business like some wild, free-spirited, chaos-loving creature — when what I really needed was a dose of structure. Yeah, I love the freedom of my business, but let’s not confuse “freedom” with “free-for-all.” Those are two very different things, my friends.
You see, I’ve always wanted to make a living from my business — but let’s face it, I’m still stuck with a job. (Yep, I started this whole chat by mentioning my 9-5, didn’t I?) It’s not that I don’t love my business. I do. It’s just that I’ve been all over the place with it. Like, one day I’m all in on one thing, the next day I’m all in on something else. It’s exhausting, really. I can’t even commit to one thing for more than five minutes.
And can we talk about how I’ve been told, repeatedly, that I need to just “focus on one thing” until it works? It’s like the diet advice equivalent of “just eat salad, and you’ll lose weight.” Sure, Jan. Maybe that works for some people, but for a Manifesting Generator like me? It’s torture. I love change, and I love having my hands in different pots. So, guess what? I’m done with that nonsense.
I realized that the boundaries I needed to set weren’t about picking one thing and sticking with it until I lost my mind. They were about giving myself the freedom to be who I truly am, and believing that’s okay. That’s the non-negotiable boundary I should’ve set for myself ages ago.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’ve had great coaches. Amazing ones, actually. They’ve helped me understand my emotions, how results are created, all the good stuff. But I was still holding back on letting myself flow and be the multi-passionate, ever-evolving person that I am. And why? Because somewhere along the line, I bought into the idea that you can’t build a successful business if you’re constantly changing things up.
Spoiler alert: I was wrong. What I needed to do all along was set boundaries that allowed me to be me — not some cookie-cutter version of what a “successful entrepreneur” is supposed to look like.
And here I am now, recording this on my phone (because why not mix things up?) and planning to post it on my blog, my platform. Because another non-negotiable boundary? I’m done posting everything on social media or other platforms I don’t control. I want my own space, where I can build a community of women like me — women who want to unscript their lives, set boundaries that actually work for them, and live in alignment with who they really are.
It’s funny, because even as I record this, I feel like I’m breaking some kind of rule. Like, as a “writer,” shouldn’t I be, you know, writing? But this is the new boundary I’m setting: I’ll create in whatever way feels good to me. If I want to record, I’ll record. If I want to write, I’ll write. The point is, I get to decide. That’s the boundary.
I hope you’re starting to see that setting boundaries isn’t about limiting yourself. It’s about freeing yourself from the expectations that don’t serve you. And yes, you can create boundaries even when you’re unscripting your life. In fact, it’s all part of the process.
So, what non-negotiable boundary do you need to set for yourself right now? Maybe it’s saying “no” to three things this week that you know you don’t want to do, and saying “yes” to three things you do want to do. It’s not about making drastic changes overnight. It’s about taking small, intentional steps toward the life you actually want to live.
Now, go out there and unscript your life. Set those boundaries. And remember — it’s your life, your rules.
Here’s to living life unscripted.
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